My Star Word this year was Miracle. When the word chose me, I wasn’t sure what to do with it. Miracles seem to be things that happen to people, not things you actively seek out.
Plenty of miracles didn’t happen in 2015.
I didn’t win the lottery. (I also didn’t play the lottery, so it truly would have required a miracle).
The US didn’t pass any legislation that would have reduced gun violence. And more and more people died.
Systemic racism did not disappear. And just this week, elected officials managed, with straight face no less, to explain how a 12 year old boy deserved to die at the hand of police officers.
My birth mother did not change her mind and decide, after all, to agree to meet me or start any kind of relationship.
And another person I love still won’t speak to me.
The arthritis in my knees seems worse, not better.
My book didn’t write itself.
Plenty of miracles I’m still waiting for.
Even with that, as I reflect back on 2015, looking for miracles, it turns out I can see them all around.
Other important relationships in my life are much stronger now than they were a year ago. Did that involve a lot of work? Yes. I’m still willing to call it miracle because it feels like a gift.
My kids are all healthy, happy, and engaging the world in meaningful ways. Miracle.
I continue to find meaning and enjoyment every (okay, almost every) day at work. The fact that I get paid to do what I love? Miracle.
I didn’t publish as much this year, but I like some of the things I did write, and I feel I am becoming a better writer. I picked up some new writing “habits” and I hope to develop them more in the year to come. Miracle.
I guess miracle has been less about magic tricks and unexplainable phenomena. It has been more about working for and appreciating the life I lead.
“Be the miracle” is a phrase I see a lot. And it isn’t a bad sentiment. “Work for the miracle” might be a more apt description for me this year.
Good counseling, the effort of time and presence, the discipline that leads to habit, the willingness to start again each day, eyes open to see blessings where they are.
Miracle took a lot of work.
I’m grateful for it all.
Blessings to you in the year that is to come.